I do believe that, for certain reasons, the burden of appearance-based expectations, and especially fatness, falls disproportionately more on women than men — but that that gap also seems to be closing somewhat, as body pressures extend to encompass people of all genders (and racialized identities, sexualities, etc.)

The only reason I don’t write more from the male perspective is because, well, I ain’t male. I can’t presume to know what that’s like. But your point is very well taken, and I’m certainly interested in learning more about the experience of men with body image pressures. In fact, I’d love for more men (like yourself) to stick around and add your two cents to the discussions here. Because it’s important for all of us to hear about this.

In fact, I was just looking at a site today that you might find interesting: Men Get Eating Disorders Too. I haven’t read through the whole thing as yet, but it looks interesting.

I am writing to ask you to mention Guys in your blog. Just mention them, no more than that. Just say that guys have this problem too.

We have Superman with chiseled muscles and ripling pecs as the male ideal. Action figures twenty years ago were average and had an unexceptional physique.

Now GI joe has the body of Mr.Olympus. This sets up expectations for men and boys.
Not necessarily to be bodybuilders but definitely not to be fat or skinny.
Unlike women, both fat and non-muscular skinny boys are considered less masculine than the alpha males that strut and preen in the locker rooms of the nations High Schools.

No guy wants to be fat or skinny. We all want to be Arnold as he was in CONAN…even though 99.99% of us could not get there if we made a pact with the devil and killed ourselves with diet and exercise.

I think guys are less crazy about it than women generally, or maybe its that they are less open about it.
But it is still a big problem with us, not just in work and society but with our kids as well.
My little son kids me about my weight and my fat tummy and I know he’s kidding. But I also know he sees the real men who look like men, in the movies and in the comic books, and he is not proud to be around his fat Dad.
Thank you ,
Michael Mynatt

Love,
-your new fan Tracy

Another of your posts triggered me to think more about my own approach to food. I have the same problems – learning to eat normally, to think normally about food so that it just becomes part of my life and not something to guilt over, so that I treat my body right. I look forward to more posts from you!

—Myca

* NOTE: That may well be never. Sigh.